Thursday, February 24, 2005

Bahamian Banker Buddy

Dateline, Mid-flight New York to Nassau
Monkey Boy was making a music video
He had the band dressed up like bankers
In three-piece suits and red power ties
He filmed us handing out bandaids
To the homeless and poor
Then we got a call from the Record Co
“Don’t miss your flight to the Bahamas”
Shit, we have one hour to make the airport
Our luggage, we are assured, is already enroute
So we hit the airport running
And then board the plane
In our fancy monkey suits

Banker Bob sitting next to me
With his laptop
Says he is on his way to check some IBC’s
(What ever the frak that might be)
For some clients keeping funds quietly “off shore”
Wink, wink, nod, nod
Oh, yes, I say, like I’m in on the joke
I’ll take Nassau over the Caymans
Any day of the week, wink, wink

Next thing I know he’s handing me a book
It’s a political thriller with an interesting twist
Like Grisham and Clancy ala Wolfowitz
The secret agent is a monster
You LOVE to hate her
But when the lefties complain
They get labeled “sexist racist pigs”
She’s powerful and cruel
And really well funded
While the patriots are at attention
She sneaks up from behind
And she robs and she rapes them

I’m not really a banker or a business cog
I tell the tax shelter guy with a wink and a nod
I’m a liberal artist in a rock n roll band
And I’m tired of fat cats
Living high on the hog

Oh, shuffle, shuffle
Well, blink, blink
You’ll have to excuse me
You’re not one of us I think
I’ve got some spreadsheets to edit
Before the plane lands
His fingers fly across numbers
Click, clickity, click
I turn toward the window
His book in my hand
Who comes up with this shit?
I don’t understand

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